Lady Luck Speaks

Desi dating and desires from the doctor of delight.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Summer's here...

..and I'm hiding from my books :P

Only kidding, I'm actually on track to complete today's revision ;) My friend and I have set ourselves timetables and treats - our treats being top-class vegetarian goodies from Curry Leaves, one of London's nicest SL takeaways.

Yummy food aside, much angsting has been done about the object of affection (not Asian, so more complicated for me) and the things I'll be upto in the summer.

Shall we bite at the hard bit first?

Up until two years ago, being in a mixed relationship didn't bother me as religion was WAY more important to me than culture. As long as the guy treated me well and was into his Buddhist ways, colour/nationality didn't matter.

Most of my Asian friends then started dating Asian guys, who, whilst not of the same nationality, came with similar priorities. Their relationships got more serious, questions were asked and I started thinking about 'long-term' questions too. I can see that common ground between lifestyles has made going 'long-term' easier for them, particularly when looking at marriage/children/parents as there'd be fewer things to compromise on.

So I started feeling the Asian thing. Pretty much everyone (mystery guy aside) I've spent time with (romantically) over the past two years has been Asian.

Whilst it's not worked out (each failure had it's own reasons), I have made some excellent friends through it and realised that it is what I feel more comfortable around.

Working in the Asian Media has also had an effect on me as I was forced to look at society more closely. It's made me aware of the benefits of both SL culture and keeping a 'foot' in SL, something infinitely easier if you're abreast of things over there, incl language and culture. Having a partner who'd be comfortable with keeping this alive and moving there if need be, would make things simpler.

A partner brought up with a similar mindset would be more amenable to this; indeed my cousin married his Italian wife for these reasons amongst others. Whilst she isn't Asian, she does buy into the immigrant ethic, extended families and non-Eurocentric thinking.

All very important things telling me to test things on a case-by-case basis. It's unfair to assume someone's ethnic identity is going to preclude them from having the same priorities. 'tis also rude to assume they're going to react a certain way based on said ethnicity - they may indeed enjoy being part of a culture they weren't born into.

At the same time few like to compromise. Not everyone can deal with the loss of 'white privilege' that comes with dating an Asian girl. Granted, things are easier than they used to be but racism still rears it's ugly head. How many guys would really want to deal with it on a daily basis?

Right. Onto more fun-stuff. My summer.

So far, I have:

8th July - RISE festival, Finsbury Park with Sway, Coxon and the Buzzcocks
- Slimelight with Miss K8 on Electro decks.

18th July - Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Earl's Court

20th July - Hanging out at C4 (day), pissing about at the usedtobecool gig at Buffalo Bar. Really funny guys who've been played on Lamacq's session a couple of month's back. They love the Paedofinder General almost as much as I do :P


At 9:40 AM, Anonymous neetpan said...

Hey... just found your blog..

seems to be very interesting, nice binch of articles youve put together.

A new reader.


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