Lady Luck Speaks

Desi dating and desires from the doctor of delight.

Saturday, December 09, 2006


Ladies and Gentlemen,

There comes a time in every conversation, where talking has to stop and listening has to start. Whilst I'm not going to share an epiphany, or a sufficiently self-smung monologue with you - I shall leave you with the latest evolution of the Sri Lankan 'bike' - Mr Theena's music questionnaire..

1. CD or vinyl – CD's! You can't fastforward/rewind or change tracks on vinyl.

2. An album you’ve been meaning to listen to – 'Tapestry' by Carol King.

3. Grammys - Important or a load of bollocks – important for raising awareness of new artists and genres at times, but mostly a self-congratulatory financially-driven load of fluff.

4. Your favourite album is – 'Mesmerize' by System of a Down.

5. Invite 10 Music people for dinner. Who will it be?

Lenny Kravitz (nutter but with it), Charlotte Church (GSOH and can be relied upon to enjoy the hospitality), Morgan Rose (one of my best interviewees), Liam Howlett (grouchy), Chris Martin (Sri Lankan parties aren't without a fight - Liam Howlett and Morgan Rose will beat him senseless for producing mind-numbing macrobiotic codswallop), Christina Aguilera, Mariah Carey, Serj Tankian, P!nk and Dave Grohl (nicest guy and best host ever).

6. Appropriate punishment for those who play Celine Dion’s "My heart will go on" while pretending that it’s still 1998 –

Enforced deafness by forcing hookworm-infected melon pulp, matchsticks (appropriate, since Ms Dion's face is melon-esque upon her stick insect frame) and crushed Celine Dion CD's against their tympanic membranes.

7. Choose your favourite instrument and its best player from your point of view.

The voice. You can't win voice. You can have an extremely versatile and tuneful one though - see Billie Holliday, Enya, Etta James, Mariah Carey, Christina Aguilera, Shirley Manson and Maria Callas. For male, see Marvin Gaye, Michael Jackson, Coree Richards (ex-Damage), Prince, Lenny Kravitz and Will Young.

8. The one piece of music that can move you to tears – music isn't noise, and noise is unwanted sound. Therefore, I'm going for the most poignant effort - Pink's 'Family Affair'.

9. You are an executive at a major label and have the power to green light one album a year. What would you do? – green light my friends' new album - it's very reminiscent of Tricky, Jega, Aphex and NIN's remix work. Decent dance music (i.e. not Basement Jaxx) has been underground for far too long...


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